Kat Clarke's Solo Performance Blog

On Monday at 11am in Studio 3 the solo performance Testomony was shown. It explored eating disorders, our relationship with food and body image.

My performance stayed true to my initial ideas with very little alterations. The performance was more chaotic than previously planned, the structure wasn’t as rigid, I played more with chaos and lack of control than before. I also wanted the performance to flow more as opposed to having definitive changes throughout the piece.

In terms of set design I used the wall of mirrors as well as positioning mirrors around my performance space, angled so as to reflect images off of one another. The idea of this was that when I moved to different places in the room, the audience would see different reflections of me as I would myself. Using these different reflections was representative of the different perspectives people have of our appearance including are own, how even when everyone is looking at the same thing each individual can see it differently. It might have also been useful to have included mirrors that alter the body, making it look smaller or larger than it is to continue this affect, this is something I would use if I were to develop and perform the show again.  Food was also scattered around the room including crackers, muffins and crisps and also a 1.5 litre bottle of coke.  The reason I chose crackers in particular was in many of the stories I found and in a few of the ones used in my voice overs, it was mentioned that they ate crackers to tide themselves over when they were hungry. As for crisps, chocolate and coke I wanted high calorie foods that some panic over and some overuse, it also made eating from the bin all that more sickening, I do not feel eating carrot sticks would have had quite the same affect.

On the mirrors I stuck up two tally’s one on the far left and one on the far right. On the far left it said “Starve” and the far right “Gorge”.  These were to demonstrate the extremes when it comes to eating food and the struggle to find a balance, they were purposely positioned far apart as they are dichotomies. Additionally, it was to represent how for an individual with an eating disorder, food completely takes over their life, in some of the stories I read they said there was a constant nagging voice telling them to put down that cracker, to exercise more, to purge. That starving or purging becomes completely addictive, it takes over their world.

Also as part of my set there was a table with a pen, chalk and hairbrush on top of it. This was purely for practical purposes during the performance. As for lighting we had a strip of white lights across my performance space, as the room is quite large I wanted to make it more intimate by focusing on a smaller section of space. Additionally, using the soundtrack of heavy breathing increased intimacy between the audience and performer. An intimate feel was ideal for the performance as I wanted the audience to feel as if they were inside the world of an individual with an eating disorder or in fact many individuals from the use of the voice overs. The voice overs told the stories, and my movements were there to physicalize their words to bring all of these stories to life.

I made some small errors during the piece, some things finished too quickly, I lost the rhythm with the exercise section; I was meant to stick to counts of 8 but got a bit confused somewhere in the middle. However, I don’t feel that any of these errors had an effect on the piece as a whole. The audience reactions for my piece were different to what I expected, as I concluded the piece by stuffing my face with food from out of a bin I expected this to be uncomfortable for the audience, but, a few members of the audience that I spoke to said the piece actually made them feel hungry, a couple of these audience members even bought quavers which were one of the things I ate on stage. I guess it is difficult to gauge audience reaction when you have not performed to an audience before, so again if I was to embark on this project in the future as part of the rehearsal process I would ask for people to come and watch. I would also include some direct audience participation in to my piece as well to involve them even more.

I also wanted to record the voice overs with a variety of different voices supplied by my fellow drama course mates, but unfortunately due to time constraints with the tech team I ended up recording them all in my own voice. Although the voice overs were still powerful, audience members thought that they might be about me, my story, which isn’t the case. I wanted them to be in an array of voices to show they were different people’s stories, it wasn’t meant to be about me, it was about them and it was their stories I wanted to share.

Overall, solo performance has been a fantastic module. It has taken me on a journey of performance like never before with such an interesting array of solo artists and performances. It has also been fantastic to see such a variety of solo performances from my peers and to feel inspired by their work.

I came across a promising article in Metro about new developments in the fashion industry for Israel.

One of fashion’s most ill kept secrets is eating disorders. Although some models are naturally quite thin, the pressure and stress can cause an obsession with being skinny, and in some cases being stick thin is the only way to get the job. However, thanks to fashion photographer Barkan’s determination to make a change, a new bill has been drafted “that would prohibit models from working with a Body Mass Index below 18.5” and  “In addition to regulating the BMI of models, this law requires advertisements to clearly indicate when they use airbrushing or any other computer alterations to a model” (Senman, 2013, p.30). This big change in Israel hopefully might inspire other countries to follow in their footsteps. Not only will the law protect the models themselves but those aspiring to be them. Additionally, knowing models have been altered or airbrushed helps teach the public realistic expectations of looks, making them realise no one is perfect, everyone is flawed.

Barkan realised how poisonous the image was that he was providing for young girls with his fashion photographs, when he met a wannabe model aged 15 and only 5st called Keti. Keti told her social worker that Barkan “will tell you I have to be this thin to be pretty” (Keti cited in Senman, 2013, p.30).  This was the shock he needed and after going “to her home four days a week encouraging her to eat, until she was a healthy weight” they went on to television to create awareness of the problem and to share Keti’s story and “immediately anorexic girls and women across Israel called Barkan, asking him to save their lives too” (Senman, 2013, p.30). This set off his successful campaign to the ministry of health.

 

Additionally, Cossar demonstrates Brazilian Model Agency Star Model’s new campaign in the fight against anorexia “The designers used Photoshop to turn real women in to life-size versions of fashion illustrations with disturbing results. Showing what women would look like if they had the same measurements” (2013, p.30).  The campaign shows how unrealistic fashion’s expectations of women are, however, there is a flaw with their campaign as Cossar suggests, “It does in fact replicate the images portrayed on “thinspiration” sites, which encourage eating disorders as a lifestyle. Worryingly, around 24 per cent of young people in a recent study have visited such sites online” (2013, p.30).

 

Personally, I find it repulsive that people would actually encourage eating disorders as a way of life. Having someone close to me go through it I can tell you no one deserves to suffer like that, mentally and physically. I was worried she could osteoporosis, become infertile or even die. It’s lucky she went to an eating disorder centre and got the help she needed, or she might not be the person she is today, she might not even be here today. So to think that there are people out there who would wish that upon people makes me angry. It upsets me that girls and boys will take their advice and go through all that pain just to feel beautiful, or in control or because they want to punish themselves. My heart bleeds for each and every one of them.

Works Cited

Cossar, Vicki-Marie (2013) ‘ Shock Tactics: Will This Brazilian Campaign work?’ , Metro, 13 May: 30.

Senman, Suna (2013) ‘Beauty and the Beast of Anorexia’ , Metro, 13 May: 30.

 

Images taken from:

Kate Moss: http://www.studded-hearts.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/kate-moss-allure-january-1993-sante-dorazio.jpg

Size Zero VSize 18: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-442138/Size-zero-vs-size-18.html

Isabelle Caro “No Anorexia”: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2010/dec/30/isabelle-caro-dies-model-anorexia

In my performance I am using food itself to demonstrate our relationship with food; as it is not only those with diagnosed eating disorders who have issues with food. Many of us complain that we eat too much junk food, or that we have to finish what is on our plate even if we’re full, that we snack when we’re bored, that we give ourselves too big a portion and so on. It is interesting how rehearsing my performance has caused me to feel differently about what I eat and drink. During the piece I eat a couple of crackers, one and a half mini muffins, a few quavers and less than half a glass of coke. There are a fair few people who I think if they were to eat a cracker or two, a packet of crisps, a muffin and a whole glass of coke spread out over the day they wouldn’t think anything of it. But by eating all of this greedily out of a bin made me feel repulsive, even though I was eating and drinking less of it than some people would. There are people who drink coke as if it is water and eat fattening snack foods as if they are fruit and there I am feeling awful and also really full as if I have eaten a huge meal.

To help me perform with food I researched food in performance and came across an article from The Guardian’s website titled Have You Got the Guts for an Edible Performance. The article opens with the discussion of dining at the theatre then progresses in to cooking on stage and even audience participation with food.  Todd explains, “But theatre audiences aren’t just being encouraged to see and smell food. We’re being invited to taste it, too. On 26-27 February, as part of Ideas Tap’s Coming Up festival, Kindle Theatre will be staging a “theatrical banquet” with a macabre twist: the audience are cast as the last remaining subjects in an apocalyptic kingdom, invited by the waning queen to dine on the “leftovers of disaster” (2011, p.1)

The use of food in performance can involve the audience, allowing them to join with the actors, it can add an interesting and interactive element to the piece, and help set the scene for performance and ultimately make the performance more real for the audience. Additionally, Todd explains that food can also be used in performance to create an intimate connection with the audience. “Some edible performances are using eating to encourage intimacy or provoke interaction. Amy Godfrey’s The Biscuit Chronicles and Caroline Smith’s Eating Secret, for instance, have supplied audiences with biscuits and cake while sensitively exploring the issues of disordered eating” (2011, p.1).

Through The Guardian’s website I was able to find Amy Godfrey’s blog which has further information about herself and her work. Amy Godfrey is not only a performer but also a writer and life model. Godfrey has also previously worked with the NHS which may explain some of the influences in her performance of The Biscuit Chronicles which “is a bright new show that tackles the sticky-fingered question of the obesity epidemic and dieting with a spoonful of scepticism and a healthy helping of laughter. Amy Godfrey and her host of comic characters guide us through the highs and lows of life in the fat lane, drawing on personal experience and posing some provocative questions” (2010, p.1). Godfrey herself struggles with her weight, “Amy Godfrey has always been a little bit fat. Not fat enough to get her stomach stapled on the NHS but fat enough to get directed to the maternity section in M&S. She’s been distraught, frustrated and addicted to chocolate Hob Nobs so now she’s getting hysterical…and creative” (2010, p.1).

As for Caroline Smith’s performance Eating Secret, Groskop sets the scene as follows,” Dressed in a pink negligee, Mertle beckons me into her candle-lit boudoir. She is wearing her trademark rollers and as she bats her gigantic false eyelashes at me, the alter ego of lecturer Caroline Smith invites me to tell her a secret” (2009, p.18).

Smith dresses as a 1950’s housewife called Mertle, takes secretes from the audience one to one then puts them in to a monologue using the same words as the confessor.  “It sounds obvious, but we can’t escape food. And our relationship with it is so complicated. Because it’s not really about food at all, it’s about how to live. Everyone has a secret about it.” (Smith cited in Groskop, 2009, p.18).  Which is exactly what I am trying to demonstrate within my performance our complex relationship with food particularly how it can be bad for our health both mentally and physically. And how that relationship can develop in to an eating disorder as we lose control or try to gain too much control over how much, what and when we eat.  However, “Smith says the project is not about eating disorders” and “the food secrets aren’t all sad, Smith says “Some of them are quite funny” (2009, p.18).

One of the LPAC Technicians did discuss the possibility of me including the opportunity for the audience to eat food as well. He reflected back to a performance he saw about starvation. The audience walked in to a room and were offered a free buffet, once they had time to get some food and begin eating they were then shown pictures of horrific starvation, including starved children. He said everyone felt so guilty they couldn’t eat. He discussed the possibility of me using a similar tactic in my performance, which originally I was interested in but then I realised I didn’t want people to feel guilty, that was not the purpose of my performance.  Although I want the audience to think about their relationship with food, I did not want them to feel ashamed of it. I also wanted them to hear all of these stories from sufferers to understand what they have actually been through, so they had a real understanding of eating disorders rather than a generalisation from media sources.  I also used a lot of mirrors as self-image is another key problem when it comes to eating disorders, so many people are not confident in their bodies with little help from the media with size zero models and airbrushed celebrities. Furthermore, I tried to create a sense of chaos and willingness to gain control that falls apart within my performance as many of the stories I read began with the individual trying to control something in a life they found top chaotic.

However, I think it would have been nice to have involved the audience more directly perhaps in a similar way to Smith by being able to share some of their own experiences with food and self- image.

Works Cited

Godfrey, Amy (2010) The Biscuit Chronicles, Online: http://amygodfrey.com/the-biscuit-chronicles/ (accessed: 08 May 2013).

Groskop, Viv (2009) ‘Deliciously Dark,’ The Guardian, 19 June: 18.

Todd, Bella (2011) Have You Got the Guts for a Edible Performance?, Online: http://www.guardian.co.uk/stage/theatreblog/2011/jan/31/edible-performance-theatre (accessed: 02 May 2013).

Anna Deavere Smith is another solo performer who collects testimonies from a variety of people to use to create performances. “Using the stories people tell her, Anna Deavere Smith performs and interprets the tough issue of race at the height of racial conflagration” (Guinier cited in Bonney, 2000, p.177).  She created a performance called Fires in the Mirror which addresses the Crown Heights Riots. Okeowo explains, “The three-day riots had been ignited by the accidental death of a Gavin Cato, a seven-year-old black boy who was run over by a Hasidic Jewish driver. Rumours that the death was deliberate and the driver was drunk (both untrue), along with the fact that a Hatzolah ambulance crew did not bring Cato to the hospital before a city ambulance could (there were different accounts of why), exacerbated the existing tension” (2011, p.1).

Anna moves between characters like a chameleon. She forms in to people of different genders, race, culture, age and social class. Similar to the work of Rhodessa Jones previously described in this blog, Anna Deavere Smith uses only their words, depicted in their language conveying their personal thoughts and feelings. Presenting these real people including eye witness accounts of the incident can be chilling, it’s a highly emotional and moving piece, particularly when the piece concludes with Anna Deavere Smith’s rendition of Gavin Cato’s father. The views expressed in the piece can be controversial, as they are the set individuals opinions and feelings of those affected by the riots. Also it is hard for the viewer to tell the difference between true and false accounts of the incident. Arguments for both sides of the conflict are well presented; Anna Deavere Smith’s piece is unbiased allowing the audience to form their own opinions.

Additionally, in Anna Deavere Smith’s performance of Twilight: Los Angeles “she both exposed and then attempted to stitch together the wound left by the riots in Los Angeles following the acquittal of the police officers who were videotaped beating Rodney King. She brings these events to life after the fact, and then breathes new life into them. She is a fluent translator who inhabits the “moments when speech fails,” and then takes us there too, to the “very moments which defy definition and description” (Guinier cited in Bonney, 2000, p.177).

Upon discovery of Anna Deavere Smith, I considered her style of performance and how I could apply that to my own solo performance. Although I could have used the testimonies to create characters on stage, I realised that my creation would be fictional. As all my accounts are from various websites I do not know the appearance and mannerisms and voice of those whose stories I have taken. Anna Deavere Smith studies and mimics those she interviews, so I would be unable to use her process successfully.

 

Read more about the Crown Heights Riots here:  http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/newsdesk/2011/08/crown-heights-twenty-years-after-the-riots.html#ixzz2PsucAJrQ

Please check out the film adaptation of Fires in the Mirror on YouTube by following these links:

Fires in the Mirror Part 1 (Film based on original stage play)

Fires in the Mirror Part 2

Fires in the Mirror Part 3

Fires in the Mirror Part 4

Fires in the Mirror Part 5

Fires in the Mirror Part 6

Works Cited

Bonney, Jo e.d. (2000) Extreme Exposure: An Anthology of Solo Performance Texts from the Twentieth Century, New York: Theatre Communications Group.

Demarcations (2011) Fires in the Mirror, Part One to Six, Online: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnkrUJny0CE (accessed: 12 April 2013).

Okeowo, Alexis (2011) Crown Heights, Twenty Years After the Riots, Online: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/newsdesk/2011/08/crown-heights-twenty-years-after-the-riots.html#ixzz2PsucAJrQ (accessed: 12 April 2013)

In order to really get the most from my performance, I felt it was important to do some research in to eating disorders, facts, figures and information to help me understand the subject better. Here is a list of my findings.

NHS choices states, “Around 1 in 250 women and 1 in 2,000 men will experience anorexia nervosa at some point. The condition usually develops around the age of 16 or 17.

Bulimia is around five times more common than anorexia nervosa and 90% of people with bulimia are female. It usually develops around the age of 18 or 19.

Binge eating usually affects males and females equally and usually appears later in life, between the ages of 30 and 40. Due to the difficulty of precisely defining binge eating, it is not clear how widespread the condition is” (2011, p.1).

NHS choices suggests, “Risk factors that can make someone more likely to have an eating disorder include:

• having a family history of eating disorders, depression or substance misuse
• being criticised for their eating habits, body shape or weight
• being overly concerned with being slim, particularly if combined with pressure to be slim from society or for a job (for example ballet dancers, models or athletes)
• certain characteristics, for example, having an obsessive personality, an anxiety disorder, low self-esteem or being a perfectionist
• particular experiences, such as sexual or emotional abuse or the death of someone special
• difficult relationships with family members or friends
• stressful situations, for example problems at work, school or university” (2011, p.1).

Here is a table from Beat’s (beating eating disorders) website.

Symptoms of Anorexia

Physical signs	Behavioural signs	Psychological signs
Severe weight loss	Wanting to be left alone	Intense fear of gaining weight
Periods stopping (Amenorrhoea)	Wearing big baggy clothes	Depressed
Hormonal changes in men and boys	Excessive exercising	Feeling emotional
Difficulty sleeping	Lying about eating meals	Obsession with dieting
Dizziness	Denying there is a problem	Mood swings
Stomach pains	Difficulty concentrating	Distorted perception of body weight and size
Constipation	Wanting to have control	Thinking about food all the time
Poor circulation & feeling cold		Feeling guilty after eating

Symptoms of Bulimia

Physical signs	Behavioural signs	Psychological signs
Sore throat / swollen glands	Eating large quantities of food	Feeling ashamed, depressed and guilty
Stomach pains	Being sick after eating	Feeling out of control
Mouth infections	Being secretive	Mood Swings
Irregular periods	Abusing laxatives	Feeling guilty after eating
Dry or poor skin
Difficulty sleeping
Sensitive or damaged teeth

Symptoms of Binge Eating Disorder (BED)

Physical signs	Behavioural signs	Psychological signs
Weight gain	Eating large quantities of food	Feeling depressed and out of control
	Eating inappropriate food	Mood swings
	Being secretive	Emotional behaviour
		Feeling guilty after eating

(Beat, 2010, p.1)

According to Eating Disorders Online there are several types of eating disorders including the commonly known ‘anorexia nervosa’ and ‘bulimia nervosa’ and ‘binge eating’, but, also, ‘anorexia athletica’ which is ” commonly used in mental health literature to denote a disorder characterized by excessive, obsessive exercise. Also known as Compulsive Exercising , Sports Anorexia, and Hypergymnasia” (Eating Disorders Online, 2008, p.1), ‘Over eating’ which is “not a specific diagnosis of any sort but may rather refer to a discrete incident of eating too much such as during holidays, celebrations, or while on vacation, or it may refer to habitual excessive eating” (Eating Disorders Online, 2008, p.1), ‘NES’ (Night Eating Syndrome) “People with NES tend to not eat in the morning and consume very little during the first half of the day. The majority of their calories are then consumed in the evening hours, so much so that sleep may be disturbed so that a person can eat” (Eating Disorders Online, 2008, p.1), ‘ Orthorexia’ which “refers to a fixation on eating “pure” or “right” or “proper” food rather than on the quantity of food consumed” (Eating Disorders, Online, 2008, p.1), and finally ‘EDNOS’ (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified) which is where a person is not diagnosed with a specific eating disorder, “When people exhibit behaviours in the spectrum of disordered eating but do not meet all the criteria for Anorexia Nervosa or Bulimia, they are given a diagnosis of an Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS). Over one-half to two-thirds of people diagnosed with eating disorders fall into the category of EDNOS”(Eating Disorders Online, 2008, p.1).

Furthermore, some people who have issues with eating and drinking do not have an eating disorder but a phobia of food itself. This is called ‘Cibophobia.’

If anyone is particularly interested in the topic of eating disorders please follow the links in my works cited for furthermore information. Unfortunately, I was unable to gather much information on ciophobia from what I would call ‘trustworthy legitimate sources’ but feel free to research that further as well.

Works Cited

Beat: Beating Eating Disorders, (2010), Do I Have an Eating Disorder? Online: http://www.b-eat.co.uk/get-help/about-eating-disorders/do-i-have-an-eating-disorder/ (accessed: 14 March 2013).

Eating Disorders Online, (2008), Types of Eating Disorders, Online: http://www.eatingdisordersonline.com/explain/index.php (accessed: 14 March 2013).

NHS Choices, (2011) Eating Disorders, Online: http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Eating-disorders/Pages/Introduction.aspx (accessed: 14 March 2013).